Why don't we just dance? [Lucian & Anemone]

[Anemone Sellar]

[continued from the Yule Ball]

Anemone didn't dare stop until they were successfully hidden on the far side of a crowd of other guests. She was glad he'd just gone along with it, but now she felt a little bad that she hadn't said something first. It wasn't that she didn't care about his opinion, she'd just felt like she needed to take advantage of the opening to get out of the way of the others. She drew off to the side and smiled apologetically up at Lucian deGrey . She didn't let go of his hand...she liked holding it. 

"Sorry about that! I thought both of those couples could use some time to talk privately, and it wouldn't hurt us to have some time, either!" She laughed softly behind her hand as she leaned to the side and peered between a few older couples to see Avalynn nervously talking to Shane. She straightened up and looked back to her own 'hare' from the chase as she nervously pushed some loose hair back behind her ear.

Now that she had time to breathe, she found herself getting a little anxious. Was it really alright for her to be dragging him all over? Was it alright for her to be his date to this ball? She was hiding things from him, already, more than one, and creating all sorts of expectations all the while. The way she was acting, it was like the two of them were already engaged. She shouldn't be treating him with such familiarity. 

Her cheeks turned bright red as she dropped his hand and clasped both of hers in front of her stomach. "We don't actually have to dance if you don't want to. It was just a good excuse."

[Lucian deGrey]

Lucian couldn’t help but laugh as Anemone dragged him to the far side of the crowd away from everyone. He didn’t dare stop her or say anything until she stopped and was apologizing to him. His brows furrowed in confusion as he looked at her. Had she done something wrong that he was unaware of? But after she explained, he smiled and nodded in understanding, squeezing her hand gently. “It’s quite alright. It was beginning to get a bit crowded anyway, and yes, some time together would be nice.”

He could tell that Anemone looked a bit nervous, but he didn’t think a whole lot about it because he was feeling somewhat nervous himself. While it certainly seemed that Anemone liked him, she barely knew him and he worried that the more she got to know him, maybe she would like him less. He tried to be a good man- strived to make his family proud, but when it came to relationships, he hadn’t been involved in many due to his focus on his career in the military. He wasn’t entirely sure he would be good at it. And perhaps Anemone would grow tired of that.

Anemone was blushing, and he couldn’t help but smile. He studied her for a brief moment, wondering what she was thinking and what it was that was making her nervous and blushing. She was dismissing the idea of dancing, and Lucian shrugged his shoulders lightly before taking a step closer towards her. He took her hand onto his and gently pulled her closer to him, placing his free hand on her waist. “I would love to dance. Perhaps we will be lucky enough again to not be interrupted or forced to switch partners.”

He led her in a slow and steady dance, his dark eyes looking down at her as he studied her closely. “I hope you have had a good Yule. Were you able to enjoy any of it today, before now?”

[Anemone Sellar]

Anemone startled softly as he took her hand, looking up to him with wide eyes as he pulled her close and led her into the dance. The only thing that kept her from either sighing dreamily, or squealing in girlish delight, was that the two impulses canceled each other out, so she just wound up grinning at him.

“A team of wild horses couldn’t drag me away,” she assured him at his teasing about being interrupted or forced to swap partners. That had been more of danger of that last time, she thought–unless another woman tried to claim his attention, in which case she’d be extremely put out. Shortly after, though, she realized her mistake. “Well, they could but I’d be kicking and screaming the whole way,” she corrected herself with a laugh.

She was feeling a little self-conscious still, but something about the way he looked at her so seriously started to make the rest of the crowd fade out. He drew her attention back in to him, and she wasn’t as worried anymore.

“I hope you have had a good Yule. Were you able to enjoy any of it today, before now?”

She pursed her lips for just a moment as she considered. Had she enjoyed it so far?

“It’s been a bit of a blur, getting ready. Not just me, but the queen, and the other ladies… But I was able to give the other women my gifts–and most of them wore them tonight! The paper-flower crown the queen is wearing, and the ones Ava and Ely had on, I made those.” She smiled. “I didn’t expect it to be such a big deal, but I’m glad everyone liked their gifts. I like to make people smile, you know?”

[Lucian deGrey]

Lucian noticed as Anemone seemed to become startled when he took her hand and pulled him close to her. He gave her a concerned look until he saw the grin on her face. He smiled back at her, gently squeezing her hand. He was about to ask her if she was alright but she was already responding to his comment about not being interrupted or pulled away from one another.

He chuckled softly at her and shook his head. “I won’t let them drag you away. I’ll not let go of you… They will have to drag me with you.” He grinned and looked at her admiringly. Anemone was so adorable, he couldn’t help but smile. Still, there seemed to be a sadness in her eyes and he couldn’t quite figure out if he was imagining it or if she just wore a cheerful mask to hide whatever plagued her. Then, his own self-consciousness got in his way and he started to worry if she was just being nice to him for some reason.

They barely knew one another and Lucian wanted to remedy that. What better way to spend the night dancing and talking so they could break the awkward tension that might have been lingering between them. Only there was one slight problem- he wasn’t very social, to begin with. He wasn’t good at small talk and he didn’t really know how to do this.

Brown eyes focused on hers as she rambled on about her day. He couldn’t help but smile again as she watched her, his eyes only trailing away to find the ladies she had mentioned with the paper crowns she had made. He nodded and looked back at her. “They are beautiful,” he quietly responded. She was speaking again and he instantly smiled again. "I like to make people smile, you know?” Lucian nodded and his smile grew slightly more. “You make me smile,” he said simply and so matter-of-fact.

He gently twirled her in their dance and pulled her back to him, returning his hand to her waist as he led her in the slow waltz. He took a moment to study her for a moment before he quietly spoke. “You seem nervous, my lady... Is everything alright?”

[Anemone Sellar]

Anemone blushed brightly at his comment about making him smile. Good! That was exactly what she wanted to do. That smile just melted her heart, despite her creeping fears and how convinced she had been–was it only a week ago? Less?–that everything that happened here at court was a game or a lie.

She sighed dreamily as she twirled out away from him, watching the candles, garlands, and brightly dressed guests whirl past her in a kaleidoscope of holiday cheer. This was what holidays were made for–spending time with people who made your heart sing, and making the most of every moment. She landed back in his arms gently and smiled up at him, although her brows quirked slightly downward in her concern when he looked her over so seriously.

Is everything alright?

Her eyes went wide, and the color drained from her cheeks. She’d been doing her best to be cheerful and act as if nothing was the matter–and really, around Lucian it was a great deal easier to do so. She felt safe with him, knowing that he thought she was worth treating with kindness. What had he said before? That she was no prize to be won? Not an object or a prize. But she couldn’t help feeling like a horse that needed to be sold before someone realized it was defective. Like she was cheating him.

“It’s…” She began, then trailed off, unsure how much to say. Finally, she just sighed. “It’s just my worries getting the better of me. It’s strange to be so happy, but not be able to shake the worries in the pit of my stomach.” She made a face and shook her head. “I can promise you this–it’s not anything you’ve done. It’s all my own.”

[Lucian deGrey]

He held Anemone at a respectable distance when she returned from the twirl and landed back into his arms. Lucian noticed the startled look on her features, and he wondered if he perhaps shouldn’t have questioned her, but he couldn’t help but sense that something was bothering her.

Brown eyes searched hers as she finally answered him, assuring him that he hadn’t done anything wrong. Yet, her words still concerned him and he looked at her with a softened gaze. Anemone had sort of hinted to him a couple of times that she maybe had a darkened past- with thinking she was a prize to be won, and that she was not used to being happy or being spoken to with kindness. It was somewhat concerning to him, especially since she seemed to be such a sweet and cheerful woman.

Lucian gave her a reassuring smile and tilted his head in a questioning manner as he regarded her, his brows lowering slightly. “What are you worried about?” He hesitated for a moment, not wanting to push her into answering things she might not have felt comfortable answering yet. He was glad to hear that she was happy, but if he could help her shake some of the worries, he would do whatever he could, “and is there anything I could do to help ease some of your worries?” He smiled then, “Even if it’s to just spend the evening dancing and talking to take your mind off of things or try to make you feel better.”

[Anemone Sellar]

Oh heaven help her, how could this man be so gosh darn sweet? He was so worried about her! It made her want to just break down and tell him the whole thing, but… She just couldn’t do that. Not only had the queen herself told her not to breathe even a whisper of it to anyone but her and the other ladies, this was hardly the time to go spilling out her darkest secret. Not here, in the middle of a ballroom full of people. That was a private kind of conversation.

And then…she couldn’t really predict his reaction. She could tell he was a good man, that he cared about her already, but the bond they’d created was still so new. They hardly knew each other, she’d said it herself. He may have a better inkling than the average person that there was a shadow to her sunny personality, but that didn’t mean he knew what the string he was tugging on would unravel. He couldn’t truly know the gravity of what she was hiding.

“I’m afraid I can’t give you the full explanation. I’m sure it will come out on its own, soon enough. It’s not something I’ll be able to keep secret forever. But, for now, I just want to be me. I don’t want my past to ruin how you see me.” She smiled apologetically. “I know you don’t think it would, and I don’t exactly mean to be dramatic, but well…I wouldn’t blame you if you did see me differently. For now…For now, I just want to focus on Yule, and on you.”

She laughed softly at her alliteration. “It’s the perfect time for us to keep getting to know each other, right? So, yes. Dancing and talking.” She nodded once, firmly.

Now then, what had they been talking about before all this? She didn't realize she’d scrunched up her nose as she fought to remember.

“Oh! I remember we were saying that we’re both the youngest! Believe it or not, I have four older sisters. Ariadne is the oldest, she’s got two children of her own, then Arielle, who has a baby too, and then the twins, Anita and Amelia. It was pretty hectic, growing up. I was always the baby. Ariadne and Arielle are really close, and so are the twins, obviously, so I always kinda felt like the odd one out. They’re good sisters, they never really meant to leave me out, I don’t think. It’s just not the same way they are with each other if that makes sense?”

[Lucian deGrey]

Lucian could tell she seemed conflicted about telling him what was on her mind, and he was about to tell her she did not need to, but she was speaking, explaining that she couldn’t anyway, at least not yet. He offered her a warm smile and nodded in understanding. He’d not push her into telling him anything she didn’t want to.

"I don’t want my past to ruin how you see me.” He frowned slightly and was about to protest when Anemone was already responding to his unspoken argument. He let his lips close and looked at her with concern in his eyes. Lucian knew she couldn’t possibly know enough about him to know that he wasn’t the judgmental type regarding someone’s past, but he didn’t say anything and just gave her an uneasy smile, nodding to her.

“For now, I just want to focus on Yule, and on you.” He laughed softly and nodded again. “I understand the Yule part… But me?” He smirked and shrugged his shoulders. Lucian never really liked being the focus of anything, really. “But yes, I suppose it is the perfect time for us to get to know one another.”

Brown eyes remained on her face as she rambled on about her family and how she felt left out because of the dynamic of hers. He nodded in understanding at her final question and he offered her a gentle smile. “I can see how that would make you feel left out.” He gently twirled her under his arm along with the song before pulling her back towards him and resuming their dance. “You’ve met one of my brothers, Wesley. He’s the third born out of the four of us.” He laughed softly. “The loud one, if you couldn’t already guess. He is fearless and adventurous...Never really stays in one place for very long. But he and I get along the most.” She smiled and glanced around the room for a moment, but he didn’t see his other brothers. His gaze returned back to Anemone and he continued explaining his family. “Then there’s Triston who is the next oldest. He’s outgoing and kind...The kind of man who can walk into a room and put everyone at ease without even trying to?” Lucian laughed and shook his head. “He was the one who started singing the nice song the night of Edward’s funeral. You know, before Wesley had to take over and make things more lively.” He laughed and shook his head. “Then William is the oldest. He’s also a very good man. Responsible, intelligent and will do anything he can to help however he can. He has a daughter- my niece, Olivia, who is the sweetest girl.”

He smiled and sighed quietly. “We all get along for the most part. All of my brothers are powerful, strong men...So I often feel like I’m in their shadows and have to prove myself, you know? Like... I am just me and I’m quiet and keep to myself and work hard at what I do… But feel it will never be enough?” His brothers never made him feel that way, but he couldn’t help feel as if he were sometimes forgotten about or would not make a mark for himself as his older brothers did.

[Anemone Sellar]

“I understand the Yule part… But me?”

“Yes, you!” She quipped before she fell silent to listen to his description of his family. It was easy to relax and almost forget about the dance, save for the soothing spin of the rhythm beneath his voice. She smiled softly as he spoke. She had encountered the other deGreys here and there, but hearing the thoughts of someone who had grown up alongside them was far different than meeting them in passing. She could easily imagine him and Wesley as children running wildly through the halls and shoving each other just like in the chase.

She was glad to hear they all got along, but her smile began to fade as Lucian compared himself to the others. Anemone’s eyes widened as he finished. Like he’d never be enough? How could he…? How could he possibly feel he wasn’t worth noticing?

“You honestly…you have no idea how lovely you are, do you?” she murmured incredulously. It wasn’t until afterward that she realized she’d said it out loud, and her cheeks flushed pink.

“I mean, um,” she stammered, flustered by her slip up. Her first instinct was to cover things up, to make a pretty excuse, and turn back to courtly manners, but that didn’t seem right when speaking to Lucian. She bit her lip and glanced at the floor for a moment before she was able to steel herself to say what she meant.

“Well, although we may not have known each other for long, from where I stand, you are more than ‘enough.’ Not only are you a kind and honest person, you care deeply about your family, and you’re a dedicated soldier, as well. You do not have to be noisy and outgoing to be worthwhile.” She looked at him sternly, although her small stature and cute face may have lessened the effect somewhat. “The day we met, you told me I was more than an object or a prize, did you not? So are you, my lord. You needn’t make it a competition.”

[Lucian deGrey]

Lucian laughed softly at Anemone’s confirming that she wished to focus on him, his smile reaching his eyes as he looked at her. She was adorably sweet and he found it difficult to not smile in her presence.

“You honestly…you have no idea how lovely you are, do you?” His brows furrowed as he looked at her with a soft gaze filled with curiosity. She thought he was lovely? Lucian couldn’t stop the grin that formed and he shook his head slowly. He honestly did not think he was anything special. She barely knew him and although it would have been easy for him to tell her that she didn’t really know much about him to assume such a thing. But he felt the same way about her. Anemone was lovely and he couldn’t help but feel like he wanted to make her smile as much as he possibly could.

He noticed how she suddenly looked embarrassed and looked down and away from him. He looked at her curiously and had been about to speak, to hopefully make her feel less embarrassed, but Anemone was speaking again, explaining to him her own opinion of him. Brown eyes watched as she gave him that stern look, and again, he smiled softly at her. Despite them not knowing much about one another, Anemone’s words were correct about him. He did care about this family, he was a dedicated soldier and he hoped he came across as kind and honest because he tried to be as much as he could.

“You do not have to be noisy and outgoing to be worthwhile.” Her words sort of struck him hard but in a good way. Being quiet and reserved often made him feel...invisible. But Anemone had noticed him despite that. He remembered telling her that she was more than an object or prize, and he was glad she remembered that- it perhaps meant that his words resonated in her and she hopefully believed them to be true. He nodded and offered her another smile. “I suppose you are right, then.” He stared down at her for a moment, admiring her for maybe a moment too long before he spoke again. “I will trust and believe and take your opinion of me to heart if you believe mine of you.” Anemone had hinted that she was not used to be treated nicely or told nice things, and he hoped that she would learn to accept that he meant what he said.

[Anemone Sellar]

“Ah!” Anemone exclaimed and was already opening her mouth to argue with his terms--when she realized how hypocritical that would be. She shut her mouth with a small pop of her lips, paused for a brief moment, then wound up laughing.

"Alright, you’ve got me.” She glanced around for a moment to make sure that there weren’t too many people paying attention, then stood on her tiptoes for a moment to kiss him on the cheek. She somehow managed to do it without totally tripping up herself or any of the other dancers, and if asked she’d attribute it entirely to Lucian. She was too happy to worry too much about anything, and that meant her feet were free to move on instinct.

“It’s a deal,” she told him with a quick wink and a beaming smile. She pursed her lips then, thinking back on what he’d said before she’d distracted him. "I think I understand, though, at least a little bit. It’s hard to be yourself when you’re living in someone’s shadow. But… I don’t know. I hope you do believe me. There’s no one I’d rather be here with.” She smiled softly and squeezed his hand.

She hadn’t ever felt like who she wasn’t good enough because of her sisters--she’d always just been Anemone. But she’d definitely felt like she could be left out in the cold, sometimes. Being the baby of the family meant that she wasn’t old enough for the ‘grown-up’ things until all the others were already well on their way. On the other hand--she’d certainly learned to think badly of herself more recently. Not because she wasn’t able to draw attention, but rather the opposite. If only she’d been invisible to the king… Well, there was no use dwelling on the past. She couldn’t change it now. And she’d told Lucian she’d try to focus on the moment at hand. Yule. Handsome, kind dance partner. It wasn’t too hard to keep her focus on him, really… she could happily just watch him smile at her all evening. Somehow making him smile made her feel like she’d done something magical, every time.

"So then, now that we agree that you’re excellent, and I have every right to get to know you… Let’s see. When’s your birthday? Oh, and how do you like to celebrate it?”

[Lucian deGrey]

Lucian chuckled softly as Anemone gave in and then kissed his cheek. It caused his lips to form a smile that touched his eyes. He couldn’t help the admiring gaze on his features as he looked down at her and listened while she spoke her understanding.

He knew his brothers did not intentionally try to make him feel that he was living in their shadows, it was perhaps his own self-doubt and anxieties that he had to live up to and be as good as his older brothers were. They were all good men, and Lucian only hoped that he could be a fraction of what they were. It was a pressure he put on himself more than anyone else did.

“There’s no one I’d rather be here with.” Lucian smiled again, squeezing Anemone’s hand in return. Brown eyes looked into hers as if he were a bit surprised to hear her words. He was just one simple, quiet man- what could possibly be so special about him, that in a room full of other eligible men, what would make him the one she would wish to be with? Because he had told her a truthful statement, that she shouldn’t be treated as a prize to be won? But he’d not argue with her, hadn’t they just agreed on that deal? He grinned slightly and nodded his head once. “I suppose I could say the same about you. That there’s no one else I’d rather be here with.” He meant it too, and he tried to ensure the tone of his voice proved that his words were true. Had he not met Anemone and were not here with her, he would probably still be seated at the table with his brothers perhaps. But he suddenly felt as if her words repeated back to her would mean nothing, so he cleared his throat before speaking again, “I can’t imagine anyone else would have made me smile as much as you have.” He squeezed her hand again before twirling her along with the music and pulling her back to him.

Lucian laughed and opened his mouth to correct her use of words. She believed that he was excellent- he had different words to describe himself instead, but he decided against arguing with her on it. So instead, he released a breath rather than the words he would have said and he shook his head as he laughed again. Anemone wasn’t letting him speak anyway, because she was already asking him his birthday and how he liked to celebrate it. His gaze softened from his laughter and he nodded in acknowledgment of her question. “January thirteenth,” he answered her simply. It was coming up soon, he knew, but he hadn’t really thought about it yet. He shrugged his shoulders then. “I’m not sure... Maybe go out with some friends for a few drinks and laughs. Most of the time I am out over on Militaire island, training, and all that… So it has just become a normal day.” He smiled softly at her. “What about you? When is yours and what do you typically do for your day?”

[Anemone Sellar]

This was what bliss felt like, wasn't it? She felt like her insides were turning to champagne--all sweetness and little bubbles. She was smiling so hard it hurt when he told her that no one else would have made him smile so much. She could say the same about him.

She somehow managed to light up even more when she heard how soon his birthday was. That was perfect! She'd just said she wanted to go on an outing with him rather than just get him a 'thing' so that they would have more time to get to know each other. His birthday just happening to be so soon was an excellent opportunity to do something special. If she hadn't had her hands busy, she would have clapped them. As it was, she settled for a little wiggle of her shoulders.

She kept her plans to herself, for now, although he'd probably catch on if she wasn't careful. She'd have to keep up their little game of questions to learn what she needed.

"Mine's July, the twenty-first. Since it's warm, and as you know I love the ocean, I usually persuade my sisters to go with me to the beach. It's been harder, the last few years, since two are married with their own children, now. And Ariadne likes to gift jewelry that's well...a little ostentatious?" She was putting it mildly, in spite of her little grimace. The last one had been a sparkling diamond choker that looked like it belonged on the queen, not her lady in waiting. It had been sitting in its box all year, unused.

"Oh, but we always have lemon cake, it's my favorite in the hot weather. It's so light and fresh…" She could almost taste it, just thinking about it. "I like spiced things in the winter, though. They make me feel warm from the inside out." She grinned again. "What about you? Do you have a favorite sweet? Or are you a savoury foods person?"

[Lucian deGrey]

Lucian noticed how Anemone lit up when he told her his birthday and he wondered what she was thinking at that moment. She had mentioned wanting to go on an outing with him and it would be a good excuse- except, depending on which day his birthday fell on, he’d most likely be away for it.
But she didn’t say anything in response, so it left him curious. Instead, she answered his question about her birthday.

Lucian smiled as she rambled on about how she typically celebrated her birthday. He liked it when she rambled on like this, but wondered if it was how she was, or if she was nervous around him. But he listened, nonetheless, taking mental notes about how she loved the ocean and going to the beach- even though he already learned that. That she liked lemon cake in the summer and spiced things in the winter. Lucian laughed softly as she brought up the jewelry her sister liked to gift and nodded in understanding.

He had never tried lemon cake before and wasn’t entirely sure how he’d feel about it, though he would be willing to try it, of course, especially if it was on her birthday. Lucian looked at Anemone admiringly as she commented about the spiced foods making her feel warm from the inside out. He laughed and nodded. “Like Cinnamon type spice, or like hot pepper kind of spice?” He asked her curiously.

At her question, he thought for a moment and grinned slightly. In all honesty, he loved all kinds of sweets and had a horrible sweet tooth. “I would have to say my favorite sweet is any kind of berry pie… But I like anything sweet.” He leaned in closer to her and grinned a bit wider. “Especially you…” Alright, so maybe that was a corny pick-up-line, but he thought it was the perfect opportunity. Anemone was so sweet and he couldn’t help it. He leaned back to look at her again, offering her a warm smile. “I prefer sweet over savory…But I like all foods.”

He spun her gently along with the song before pulling her back to him. “So tell me, Anemone… What do you like to do for fun? Do you have any hobbies that you do in your spare time?”

[Anemone Sellar]

"Oh, cinnamon, and ginger, and cloves…" she clarified.

Berry pie. Check.

Anemone's face went blank for a moment as she processed the 'especially you' remark--she almost wanted to roll her eyes but she couldn't do it. She was just too pleased that he thought she was sweet and he liked her to be irritated by it. Wow. She was in deep.

His question about what she did in her free time caught her by surprise. Did she really have free time? If she was up and alert, chances were she was doing something for the queen, or at least spending time with her and the other ladies, even if they were just all working on their own tasks in the same room. She pursed her lips and was silent for a few measures of the song, considering her answer.

"I honestly don't spend a lot of time alone. I mean, even when I'm doing my own chores and things, I like to be around people…If I'm around other people, and conversation, hustle and bustle...then I can't think about the past. I have to focus on what's going on at the moment." She shrugged softly. She hadn't really realized that she'd been avoiding things she used to like. "I used to do more art on my own, making paper flowers, like those," she nodded to the ones pinned to his lapel, "Or woven bracelets, embroidery, things like that. I've always liked making things. But I also like being outdoors, just walking, even. The sun makes me feel alive."

She sighed wistfully, then caught herself. "I'm sorry, that was a bit silly, wasn't it? I'm not really a flower, even if I'm named for one. Anyway, what about you? What do you like to do when you're not working?"