About Last Night...

[Lorcan Drach]

After catching Turke up on what had happened, Lorcan knew he should speak to Jayna. The only problem was, there was no amount of sorry, or anything he could give her to ease the ache and pain she felt at her lost Clan. There was nothing he could do, as he’s sat on his hands for the last three years, and the Wynfried woman was the first sign of him actually doing anything out of the ordinary.
He still wasn’t understanding why he did it. Maybe a part of him was finally tired of it all. Everything his father was doing, and maybe a part of Lorcan actually wanted to be better. But he still needed information out of the Wynfried. He had to know why she’d risk coming into Drach territory and if there was something more perilous he should be worried about.

It was early evening when he finally approached Jayna. She was busy scrubbing the dishes, and Sienna was happily playing with her Doll near the fire. Gwen was nowhere to be found and Violet and Hanna were both reading. If Turke was smart, he was resting his ankle. Lorcan kicked off the snow from his boots as he entered and walked over to the fireplace, filling the woodbox before he lightly ruffled Sienna’s hair and closed the door.

Kaige was in the town hall with a meeting that, much to Lorcan’s annoyance...He didn’t want his sons at. Despite Lorcan being his 2nd in command. He had a short window to speak with Jayna thanks to the meeting and he glanced over at the girls before he came up behind her as casually as he could. Picking up a mug from her dry pile. “We need to talk.” His voice rumbled out lowley. Only loud enough for her to hear as he moved to making himself a cup of tea. “Not here.” He told her before he turned to head back outside. Taking the steaming cup with him.

Jayna Moreling

[Jayna Moreling]

Jayna was silent, as usual, when Lorcan returned. Sienna was happily braiding her doll's hair to match her own--Jayna had taught her to do a four-part braid that morning, and she was practicing. Jayna, too, wore her hair in braids, though her style was more intricate than little Sienna's. Several small braids wound into one large one that lay heavy down her spine. It felt good to braid her hair again, to play with it as she had done when she was a girl. No one seemed to have noticed the change save for Sienna; the littlest Drach had told Janya she looked pretty.

She scrubbed, rinsed, and dried mechanically, ignoring him still as he strode over and took a mug from the towel where the drying dishes sat. His declaration that they needed to talk made her roll her eyes, although her stomach rolled along with them. Talk. About Aspen, most likely. Sleeping on the subject hadn't made her any less furious with him, but she was smart enough to keep that to herself, at least in public. It brought her a grim satisfaction to know that once they were alone, she could say what she pleased. After her resolution last night that she would no longer keep silent, she had found that she was bursting at the seams with opinions on everything. And Lorcan was about to offer her an opportunity to share.

She snagged a jar of honey--an excuse to be out there while he drank his tea, and followed after him a moment later.

Out in the snow, she raised an eyebrow at him and put her free hand on her hip.

"Yes?"

[Lorcan Drach]

Once outside, Lorcan looked around the side of the house. Blue eyes looking both ways to ensure that they were alone. Once Jayna came out, he glanced over his shoulder at her and nodded in the direction of the stables. Wanting her to follow, he led the way. The horses had already been cared for, and Lorcan would shut the door once Jayna had entered. He didn’t turn to her, rather he stared at the grain of the wood, while he felt the heavy burdens he faced weigh even more heavily on his shoulders. He was tired, and he was angry, and he knew he was going to be more tired by the end of this conversation.

Jayna had a right to be furious with him. But what could he have done? The time Jayna came to the Drachs, Lorcan hadn’t been himself. He’d lost his wife and child three days before she lost her clan, and he’d lost his brother in the attack. Something he no doubt would be pleased about. One less Drach to keep her captive. It’d been months before he’d even spoken, and finally, years later, he was feeling somewhat normal again. Despite the void he felt. He couldn’t make the same promise to the Wynfried to Jayna those years ago. But now? Now he was trying to be better. It was time to be accountable.

Hold the cup in both hands he made a slow turn towards her. Pressing his tongue against the inner part of his cheek before he clenched his jaw. He let another sigh out, before his blue gaze flickered up to the caged lioness’s eyes. “I want to have your hand looked at.” He murmured quietly. Nodding to the bruised knuckles he knew she’d lashed out at that wall. He’d seen the way she’d held it last night on the ride back. Not what he should be saying, but it was an olive branch. At least the sort of olive branch Lorcan was trying to convey. Kaige had beat feelings out of him. Showing any emotion or feelings made you weak, Lorcan struggled with conveying anything that wasn’t a grunt, a glare, or a stoic expression. Only now, he looked exhausted. He hadn’t slept well, as his mind tried to figure out a way to get him, and everyone else he’d involved out of this mess safely.

“There’s more,” Of course there was more, or else he wouldn’t bring her out here. He even flinched just thinking about the possible snide comments, and his hands tightened on the mug. “I don’t claim to know what you’re going through. And I know life has not been easy here.” He kept his voice down, forcing himself to hold her eye despite how much he wanted to bend his head in shame. “But I-” he swallowed a lump that had formed in his throat, and for a moment, Lorcan wasn’t able to talk. His lips pursed, as he clenched his jaw. Ignoring the pain of the bruise that covered a section of his jawline from the gift his father had given him the night before. He forced himself to steel his resolve. He was a dragon, and dragons didn’t cower. They were strong, and Lorcan was probably about to do the bravest thing he’d ever done in his life. “I want to make it right.”

[Jayna Moreling]

Oh lovely, he was pulling her even farther away from the others. A definite sign this was going to be about the Wynfrid girl. Jayna's grip on the honey tightened, but she followed him without any audible protest.

“I want to have your hand looked at.” was the first thing he said.

Jayna's upper lip twitched as she fought to keep her mouth closed. Fantastic. He wanted her to get medical care for the injury she'd given herself so she wouldn't rip out his heart. Lovely. What a fucking gentleman. It was a struggle, but she kept her chin high, her mouth shut, and her spine straight. He kept talking.

“There’s more [...] I don’t claim to know what you’re going through. And I know life has not been easy here. [...] But I- [...] I want to make it right.”

Jayna met the dragon's eye as he fumbled his way through his little speech, even when the muscles in her jaw began to ache from the way she was clenching it shut with all her might. Two Drach apologies in twenty-four hours! Any other circumstances, and she might think this was a miracle. Right now? It felt like a slap to the face. She'd thought for a long time that she couldn't get any more degraded unless Kaige had actually managed to force her into his bed. She'd been wrong. This was humiliating.

"Lorcan, Son of Kaige, if you weren't already bruised I swear on my life I'd do it myself," she practically spat back. Despite how desperately she hated it, she could already hear the tears thickening her voice, felt them welling in her dark eyes. She shook her head as she spoke and gestured angrily with her uninjured hand. "I've been here, under your roof, caring for your sisters, for years. Years! And now, one pretty little blonde under your nose and suddenly you feel moved by the gods? How in the fuck do you think that makes me feel?"

She spat at his feet. This was pathetic. Both of them. She wiped viciously at the tears on her face with her hands, no more gentle with her face than she was with him. She raised a finger to him with her other hand, making sure he wouldn't interrupt.

"I'm so sick of being garbage, of being an afterthought," she told him, quieter now. She'd gotten out the worst of her anger, and worse than that, she knew better. Being righteous wasn't going to get her anywhere. "And I'm even sicker of feeling pity for you people. I've been a prisoner here, serving in silence, for three years. And you know what? I still can't wish anything worse on you than Kaige already does." She laughed once, bitterly, and wiped her cheeks again. "That's why I punched the bloody wall instead of you. Because I fucking know better. Because I am better than that worm."

She raised her eyes to the ceiling and took a deep breath, trying to reel herself in. Showing her true colors was one thing, losing control was another. She didn't need to cry herself into the ground two days in a row. She let her gaze fall back to Lorcan, looking at him with more pain in her eyes than anything else.

"I just don't understand. Why now? None of the murders, the beatings, the years passing… But this one girl shows up and all of a sudden it's different? Why didn't I matter? How--How come--" her voice broke, and she pressed her fist to her mouth as she turned away from him for a moment, trying to fend off another fit of crying. She swallowed hard, then turned right back.

"I'd go to my death protecting those girls," she declared fiercely. "I'd fight tooth and nail to keep them safe. And you know what? It fucking hurts to not matter that way to anyone else."