A secret

[Sienna Rousseau]

Sienna had avoided the rogue court now for the past month, sending a letter just stating she was ill and needed some time away and would message them if she needed anything. With the safety of that cover, she would instead be at her family's rebuilt manner that still sold plenty of silks to continue generating an income for the young lady.

Inside she would be up in her room, sitting on the floor in just a simple pale lavender dress that clung to her and showed the growing bulge of her midsection. She recently had a visit with a doctor who told her what she feared and now she was curled up crying and freaking out a little as she didn't want this, was not ready for children but worse of all, she had to somehow tell the court and the baby's father that she was expecting.

The young woman would then get up, taking the pail out and getting a clean one from the maid as she carried it with her to the kitchen. She was waiting for tea now, her head in her hands as she sent away the other servants- especially when she felt herself getting ill once more into the bucket before swearing softly under her breathe as she got up to put it away. She hoped no one was hearing her right now, she'd never been ill a day in her life but this illness was not really an illness and she didn't know what was going on with her. She would then stand by the stove, waiting for the pot to get hot finally as she pushed her messy red hair from her face.

Theo Davore

[Theo Davore]

Sienna wasn't the only one avoiding the Rogue Court these days. The only problem was, Theo didn't really have an excuse to give. All he could say was that he was "working on it" and that Xilas would have his money "any day now", so on and so forth. He knew it was only a matter of time before the Rogue King got fed up with his stalling. Fortunately (or unfortunately), the man seemed to be preoccupied with something else. It would seem their dear Carys had been up to something she shouldn't have and Xilas was angrily dealing with that. Theo didn't know any more details and he didn't really wish to know, if only for the fact that he didn't need more drama.

There was one place he could get away for a short while, and he was supposedly welcome to it at any time. He'd heard through the grapevine that his "sister" wasn't feeling well, so this was the prime opportunity to kill two birds with one stone: check in on her as well as hide out for a couple of hours. The only thing was, he probably wasn't prepared for the news the young woman had.

Letting himself in, the servants nodded their head in acknowledgement as they passed by. They were used to him coming and going at strange times, so there was nothing unusual about it now. When Theo asked where Sienna was, he was directed towards the kitchen where he was just about to open the door...only to hear the violent retching from the other side. Oh. Ewe. Oh dear. She really was sick.

"Sienna...?" he spoke her name slowly and hopefully just loud enough for her to hear as he pushed the door open and peered in, spotting her immediately by the stove. "Sienna, love, you look-" Normally he always complimented her because she was a beautiful young thing, but the sight of her made him falter. Even the smile on his face lessened a little. "Lovely...as always." Well, in truth, she looked pale, like more than usual. "Ashen" was probably the better term for it.

Cautiously slipping into the kitchen further, he shut the door behind him, his brow furrowing. "You're not looking well. Everything alright? Have you seen a doctor?" He'd yet to notice anything out of the ordinary as he made his way over, ushering her by the shoulders to go sit down. He could handle the tea once the kettle started screaming.

[Sienna Rousseau]

She felt like hell, worse then hell, why did women even enjoy this? Or want this? She really had no clue as she moved to take the bucket from the room and pass it to a maid because she did not want it around her as she went to try and finish making tea. That was turning into a painful chore that was irking her to no end.

As she stood there though, she was surprised by a voice. A mental *oh no* ran through her as she looked over at Theo. She was paler than normal, dark circles under her eyes as she hadn't been sleeping much at all but worse of all for her is that she knew her clothing wasn't hiding anything and she felt her cheeks burn a bright red, "Now Theo...we both know I look like a wreck," she told him, a little tease in her tone as he tried to compliment her but she just felt wretched.

Him approaching and then urging her to sit would be met with little resistance, she would sit, her arms folding on the table as she rested her head on them while trying to process why he was here. "Yes...three in fact and they all say I'll be feeling better in another month," she told him honestly. Did he hear her moments ago? She hoped not, it was a horrible thing and she was constantly doing that every few hours and it was taking a tole on her body to be constantly ill and not even eating right.

"Are you hiding again?" she asked him, a little tease in her tone as she looked over at him, turning to sit with  her side leaning against the back of the chair as she rested her chin on it to look at him while he handled the kettle.

[Theo Davore]

"And we both know that I'm always polite..." he joked. Or half-joked. Sure, she didn't look as good as she always did, but she was clearly unwell. Even Theo wouldn't hold that against her, it was obviously out of her control. And for a few more blissful seconds, she should be happy that her dear friend was quite oblivious when it came to certain things. Which was funny, really. As a thief, he noticed everything, he had to notice everything, every little detail.

But right now, he was clearly blind. Maybe because he felt Sienna would never keep something from him.

Once she was sitting, he regarded her with confusion. "Another month?" That just seemed...strange, didn't it? "What have you come down with?" At the idea of it being contagious, Theo actually flinched a little and took a step back. Sorry, he couldn't help it.

Theo smirked. "I'm always hiding, love." Now that he was really looking at her, he felt like something else was off. Her stomach was currently obstructed by the table, but there was a fullness to her face, a little more than usual. And, now that he was looking and he really couldn't help himself...her breasts looked a bit unusually large.

What the...?

The humor dissipated from his face. "What's...going on, Sienna?" he asked, shifting the topic of conversation. Then, now that she had turned in her seat, he finally noticed the prominent bump of her once flat stomach. "Oh..." Theo murmured as things began to slowly click into place. Then he looked panicked. "Oh God!"

Sure, why don't you exclaim a little louder. That will certainly help matters, you idiot.

[Sienna Rousseau]

"Mmhm very polite," she teased with a tired smile. She had not expected him to come poking around here, she wasn't even dressed and felt even more exposed since she couldn't hide behind a dress that was meant to conceal her growing issue. She did hope he didn't take too much stock into her appearance, just send her to bed and call it a day and they would be all good.

"I have come down with a case of being female and sometimes being female makes a woman ill for a months at a time," she retorted a little sarcastically, "It's nothing, just a flu," she told him after the tease. Yes, totally just a flu not small persons growing inside her and draining the life out of her and making her stress to the ends of the earth at what she was going to do.

It did take her moment to realize he was looking at her, like really looking, and that made her fidget, "Who did you upset this time?" she asked him, a little tease in her voice- that is at least until the audible gears clicked into place and she would hide her face.

Well, if she thought it would be taken well she was wrong, instead, she would get up and walk across the room with her arms crossing her chest, "Thank you, I know ok? You don't need to let the entire countryside know though Theo," she told him, unable to help the scold in her tone but mostly it was wavering as she was fighting down the tidal waves of emotions. She would start to bite the knuckle of her thumb as her heart hammered in her chest.

Sienna didn't mean to snap at him, she just had not been prepared for anyone to be over so she was hoping he'd be oblivious and just not take notice to her body changing- she was totally wrong on that one. 

[Theo Davore]

All of a sudden, he wasn't thinking about his own plights. He wasn't thinking about Xilas cutting his head off and mounting it on a pike. Suddenly, it was all about Sienna because something was definitely not right. And when he had realized it, it was impossible to unsee. He probably looked like a gaping fool, just standing there wide eyed and staring at her.

It was only her mood that snapped him out of this strange trance. Those dark eyes focus on her face as she came a little closer, scolding him. He swallowed the lump in his throat before a hand ran down the front of his face. "I'm...I'm sorry, but-" Theo was trying to find his words and clearly struggling. It was clear that she was fairly far along and hadn't even told him about it, which meant it was bad. It had to be. "Enna, why...didn't you tell me? How did this happen?" The thief made a strange face because, yes, he knew how it happened, but he was more like asking how she could let it happen.

That usually smirking and joyful expression darkened just seconds after. "Who is he?"

[Sienna Rousseau]

It was hard to be mad at him, she normally would have told him but she was embarrassed and ashamed that this had even happened to her. The rare time she let herself do something for herself and she found herself pregnant by a man she barely knew and it made her feel like a scared child all over again.

"Because I can barely come to grips with this...I didn't want this- I didn't try to...I was just... ill-informed on these things," she admitted to him. Intimacy or relationships had never been a topic she'd ask anyone about, she was never overly interested given their lifestyle, "I feel so stupid and I don't want them to throw me out because of this," she told him, not even hiding that fear. She didn't know what their policy on pregnant spies were in the slightest and that was stressing her out as well.

Oh crap. She felt her face warm as further embarrassment crept up, "His name is Andrew. I met him three months ago at a party that I was snooping around at. It was boring and he was charming and I let myself just have fun for once...a fair amount of wine was involved as well," she told him as she moved to just rest her head against his chest, "Please don't hate me Theo...I'm trying to find him, I hope he'll be at the ball and then I can tell him," she told him softly, her voice wavering. She knew it was taboo to be unwed and pregnant. Maybe she could hide here and say she adopted the babe after it was born but that was still months of not going out and people would notice her absence for sure. 

[Theo Davore]

He was far from angry...but he was certainly surprised. Actually, he kind of didn't know what to think or feel about any of this. The fact that she hadn't told him, however, bothered him a little. Despite the craziness of it, he would have been by her side this entire time if she allowed him to be. That's what family did. He loved this redhead like she was his sister, no matter what kind of stupid things she got herself into.

She still loved him, no? And Theo did a lot of stupid things.

He gently took her by the shoulders as she spoke. She mentioned "them" and he knew she meant the Rogue Court. In truth, he didn't know what their policy was. Sienna was meant to remain and be their eyes in the court, but with a child possibly born out of wedlock, where would this leave her? The worry etched his face but he didn't voice any of it yet.

"You're not stupid, Sienna..." he told her quietly, trying to console. His arms wrapped around her protectively. His words were partially a lie, but things happened. Things out of one's control, and although you were very aware that it was possibly the most foolish thing in the world, you did it anyway. Foolery was his middle name.

"Andrew who?" Did she not know his last name? That made him more nervous but he wouldn't pressure her further on that just yet. When she asked him not to hate her, he sighed lightly and drew back from the embrace, just enough to cup her face in his hands. "No, no, none of that. You know I can't hate you, little one. Never." He offered a smile of reassurance. "Just let me help you, however I can, alright?"

[Sienna Rousseau]

Sienna couldn't think to tell him, she was at war with herself and slightly hated herself because she had let herself do something so foolish. She normally was so smart and careful, clever to a fault but now she was pregnant and scared. She didn't realize how scared until she had been told what was wrong with her and she just clammed up and wanted to hide away from the reality of things.

This may be the place that she could call home but the rogue court was her family and home, this had never been a concern before because she was never expected to lay with others. Never would for information because that was where she drew her line, giving herself to others for information. She'd rather take being flogged over that.

Her arms would wrap around him as she pressed her face against his chest, her fingers bunching up his shirt tightly, "I feel it, I feel so stupid because I'm always so careful and the one time I let myself just..." she couldn't make more words as she pressed her head against his chest more.

"I don't know, we only knew first names. I know what he looks like. Tall, black hair- very picky about his hair, not as pale as myself but a bit." she told him, trying to describe him without being weird. When he pulled back to just cup her face in his hands, she couldn't stop the tears rolling down her cheeks, "I messed up so badly Theo...I don't know how to be a mother or do my work when this is going to get in the way. I just...I just don't know what to do," she told him, her hands covering his as she nodded, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you...I was- am - embarrassed by this because I know no matter what happens...I can't give them up," she told him, her voice wavering a little. She knew deep down that she couldn't abandon them. Sienna knew what abandonment felt like and she could not do that to her own flesh and blood, even if she did not want the situation at all.

[Theo Davore]

Theo could only imagine what she must be going through, what she must be thinking. It was also very clear that Sienna hadn’t intended for any of this to happen, so that just made this an even bigger whirlwind. He wanted to ask who the man was, if only because it could dictate a lot as to where this would go...and what the Rogue Court would think.

Would they care? Those of the dark court were allowed to have lives and families, but he still did not know. If this man was a high target, a high member of society, then...

Would she be safe?

He continued to hold her close, giving her whatever comfort he was able to. ’I feel so stupid because I'm always so careful and the one time I let myself just…’ ”Shh, no...it’s alright. We’ve all been there. We both know I’ve made plenty of mistakes before…” he said, trying to cheer her up, to let her know it was alright. Truth of the matter was, he wasn’t sure, but he’d be there by her side for as long as she needed him to be. So long as his own mistakes didn’t come back to haunt.

And he’s been making quite a few as of late.

Listening as she described the man, he burned the description into his brain before she was confessing her worries. Holding her hands in his against his chest, he craned his neck to look her straight in the eye. ”You will simply do it. Because you’re strong, you’re smart, and you’re capable. I always say...things happen for a reason. Maybe...this was just meant to happen.” He shrugged his shoulders lightly before that lopsided grin appeared once again, softer this time. ”And...the rugrat will have Uncle Theo watching over them.” And that was certainly a promise.

[Sienna Rousseau]

Sienna was in a mild state or torment because she had no clue what she was going to do. Would the court accept her as this? Would they make her get rid of it or force her to leave? They were the only family she knew and she didn't want to lose them but she couldn't harm the ones growing inside her either- she swore she felt something already.

She clung to him at the moment, a small laugh leaving her, "Your mistakes are ease to fix...how is mine though?" she asked him curiously. She couldn't help but laugh a little at the chaos he often found himself in and she was happy to be able to provide a safe place for him when he needed it.

Her eyes would look up at his, tired and weary from her stress and worry from how long she had been just keeping this a secret from everyone. "What reason would this be? The man who caused this only knows me as a lady of the court," she explained to him. She hadn't given herself away to him, no, only told him she was a lower noble lady who was just at a party.

Hearing him say that though just made her smile, a small laugh leaving her as her head bowed a little as she took his hand and pressed it against her cheek, "Yes...Uncle Theo will have double trouble to watch over, and help teach how to pick a pocket," she told him with a small smile. Oh yes, she knew, she was told rather quickly by the midwife- she passed out hearing that the other day.

[Theo Davore]

Theo tried to laugh with her, but it wasn't real, and it was far more quiet than usual. Were his mistakes easy to fix? If that were the case, he wouldn't be under Xilas' heel. He wouldn't be trying to schmooze a married marchioness in order to pay his debt to the Rogue Court. Every time he tried to fix his problems, he only seemed to fall deeper.

Instead of answering that, he moved on. "They may not care, Sienna, or...you will owe Xilas a great debt." As much as he wanted to, he wasn't going to sugarcoat anything. She needed to understand what this could mean, and it could literally get worse or be completely fine. Neither of them knew the true answer to that yet. "But you'll get through this. We will get through this." Again, he wasn't going to leave her to that ravenous wolf. He was used to being hunted by that man and would gladly take the brunt of whatever he might wish to throw at his "little sister".

A shrug. "I don't know...but never question fate. Things will be revealed in time, I'm sure of it." And now he was secretly making it his mission to find this man, and find out whatever he could about him. Perhaps he was just some no named noble that the Court wouldn't care about...but if he wasn't? Well, they'd have to prepare themselves for whatever the Rogue King decided he wanted to do.

With her following words, though, he paused. His face was blank for a long moment before a dumbfounded expression washed over it. Eventually, it all clicked together and his eyes were widening in surprise. "I'm sorry...did you just say...two? You're...oh my God." Now he was laughing in shock.

[Sienna Rousseau]

Sienna had very few encounters with the Rogue King but he was never cruel or cross with her, they were polite and sometimes decent interactions but she was also concerned about the Queen. She had been like a mother to her and not telling her as well was just as painful but she needed to find the babys father before she did anything in telling her.

"I've given my life to the court...I've been in it since I was a child- you know this, he knows that...what if I can't pay off that debt?" she said softly, her head dropping a little before giving him a small nod. He said we, and she fully believed he wasn't going to let her go at this alone and try and tell them, "Will you...give me until the end of Yule before having to tell them? When I do will you be there?" she asked him, she needed him, needed her big brother- even though he most likely was avoiding the King but she couldn't do this alone.

"I question it because sometimes fate is weird and lands people in my shoes," she told him with a little playful quip. She was just scared, scared of her future, scared of what she was going to have to do and change, of what it might mean for her secret hideaway from everyone. So many worries were running through her mind right now.

The blank look on his face was rather priceless, she wanted a painting of it as he stared and then went buggy eyed, "Two. Yes. I fainted when the midwife told me the other day," she told him as he laughing in utter shock and surprise from her news to him. It was why she was showing so much at barely three months. "The...the midwife will be around about every two weeks to check on them though, she's one of the best and good at keeping her mouth shut on delicate matters," she told him as she would lean into him, she felt less sick from the stress now, and that was an amazing feeling. "Though I might have lied and said my husband was abroad on business so she would judge me less," Sienna admitted. It was a simple lie and she easily had slipped a band around her finger to fool the woman so she was safe at least from some judgement.

[Theo Davore]

He wasn't Xilas' favorite, everyone basically knew that. Still, that didn't mean he was going to leave Sienna to deal with her situation all by herself. Personally, he didn't want her to tell the Rogue King anything if she could help it. Perhaps there would be another way?

Maybe, if Xilas demanded a debt to be paid, Theo's new...target would be enough to pay off both his and Sienna's. How wealthy was the marchioness, he wondered?

Theo didn't say anything about this out loud, but her question made his expression soften as he placed his hands upon her shoulders. "There is no rush, Sienna...you just have to be extra careful about keeping this secret. But...should you need to tell him, I'll not leave your side." Inwardly, he wondered if that would hurt his sister's case, considering Xilas would sooner skewer him than anything.

Yet, none of this was as scary than knowing there were two spawns growing inside her. Two! "I might faint myself..." he admitted quietly, attempting to blink the surprised look off of his face. That was going to be impossible- he needed another minute or so. As Sienna leaned into him, he was lightly embracing her again, only hesitating slightly as if he was afraid he would accidentally crush the babies somehow. Theo would nod. "Just keep lying until you can't lie anymore. Maybe...this won't be so bad?" Well, he was trying to be optimistic. "Do you have an idea on where to find the father?"

[Sienna Rousseau]

Sienna knew Theo would be there for her, he had always been and she for him. She didn't see any phase of her life without this man somewhere in it and around but she also didn't want him to get into more trouble with Xilas either. She could pay off his debt, maybe that would help.

"I fear I will have to, It's not something I can easily hide and I'm supposed to be in the castle as a maid to hear what I can...I can't have them seeing I'm pregnant," she told him with a worried sigh leaving her. She needed to work but she couldn't and it was stressing her out to where she felt a slight pain in her side.

That made her laugh, "You? I fainted hearing it," she told him with a shake of her head as she would hold onto him though just incase he truly did pass out; why should he? He wasn't the father NOR the one pregnant with two little lives that would depend on you for years to come. Holding him now, her eyes closed as her fingers bunched his shirt a little while just wanting some of his confident strength.

"Maybe...I hope..." she told him softly before she gave a small shrug, "I am hoping he will be at the Yule Ball...I'll be going and staying there all night until I find him and if I don't I know how to ask around to find a person without raising suspicion," she told him with a small sigh. That night was going to be painfully difficult to hide her current condition while trying to be happy during party where everyone would be laughing and drinking.